I was listening to an interview on a podcast recently with a guy named Kaiser Kuo, a Chinese-American long-term expat in China, and he mentioned something that has become my new favorite idea. He was talking about the constant negotiations and mental revisions a Westerner has to do throughout daily life while living in a place like China and how sometimes, even though you see injustice and inequity and just plain illogic all around you that rankles, you can't live your life there in the "house of indignation."
I love that idea, because it seems to me that sometimes the house of indignation is where many expats can choose to live. I'll admit: there are many hard days when the illogical insanity of it all boggles the mind, when the injustices are thrown in your face, and when it can seem as if everything going on around you is simply wrong, on so many, many levels. But I know some expats who simply camp out there in the house of indignation, always unhappy in their new home, never letting it become a "home" at all. And that way lies madness!
It reminds me of when my Western-raised, Southern-transplanted parents moved us all to Hawaii when I was 10. My parents made a concerted, concentrated effort to get to know our neighbors, mainly those folks in our church congregation because there were very few neighbors (any?) who didn't go to church. They went visiting to everyone and later said, in some cases, they were the first "haoles" to enter into some folks' homes. Because of that, they were beloved, we were accepted, and our time in Hawaii was pretty much idyllic most of the time. In contrast, there were some other people in our town who felt like they had been exiled to this faraway place away from the mainland, some of whom maintained that feeling of disconnection for their entire time in the islands and ended up having a very different experience there.
The same is true here. I have to be really careful not to get caught up the sessions of complaining that sometimes arise in Doha because it's so easy to do just that, complain and complain and end up feeling horrible about everything, which only makes everyday life here that much harder. When I first arrived, I went to a few new-to-Doha moms events and almost invariably came home telling the husband I wouldn't be returning because everyone was so negative about EVERYTHING and I was pretty sure that would ruin my time here. Because, let's face it, I am not at heart a sunshine and roses kind of person. I already skew toward the glass is half empty side of life, but if I were to give in and settle down permanently in the house of indignation, I know I would never leave!
Instead, as we get ready for our trip back to the States (less than one week today!), let me tell you a few (minor) things I won't be missing but that have been making me shake my head and laugh lately.
You know it's hot here, right? How hot is it? So hot that when you raise the lid of the toilet, steam rises from the naturally hot water. Cold, cool, even tepid water temperatures are long gone by now; every bath or shower is a sauna whether you like it our not and even our enormous compound pool that does not have a functioning chiller (yep, that's a thing here) feels like bathwater from top to bottom.
It's so hot that even though the husband put the sunshade in the window before we went into church on Friday, when we got back into the car several hours later, the steering wheel was so hot he couldn't actually hold it to drive. Luckily, we had a solution for that situation:
It's so hot that we all are enjoying as many cold drinks as possible and we all look a little wilted:
The forecast for Doha says it will reach 104 today, with temperatures hitting 111 by midweek, just before we leave. In contrast, the midweek high in Utah will be a paltry 93 degrees, which is just a shade warmer than our overnight LOWS this week. I think we're all ready for the change!
I love that idea, because it seems to me that sometimes the house of indignation is where many expats can choose to live. I'll admit: there are many hard days when the illogical insanity of it all boggles the mind, when the injustices are thrown in your face, and when it can seem as if everything going on around you is simply wrong, on so many, many levels. But I know some expats who simply camp out there in the house of indignation, always unhappy in their new home, never letting it become a "home" at all. And that way lies madness!
It reminds me of when my Western-raised, Southern-transplanted parents moved us all to Hawaii when I was 10. My parents made a concerted, concentrated effort to get to know our neighbors, mainly those folks in our church congregation because there were very few neighbors (any?) who didn't go to church. They went visiting to everyone and later said, in some cases, they were the first "haoles" to enter into some folks' homes. Because of that, they were beloved, we were accepted, and our time in Hawaii was pretty much idyllic most of the time. In contrast, there were some other people in our town who felt like they had been exiled to this faraway place away from the mainland, some of whom maintained that feeling of disconnection for their entire time in the islands and ended up having a very different experience there.
The same is true here. I have to be really careful not to get caught up the sessions of complaining that sometimes arise in Doha because it's so easy to do just that, complain and complain and end up feeling horrible about everything, which only makes everyday life here that much harder. When I first arrived, I went to a few new-to-Doha moms events and almost invariably came home telling the husband I wouldn't be returning because everyone was so negative about EVERYTHING and I was pretty sure that would ruin my time here. Because, let's face it, I am not at heart a sunshine and roses kind of person. I already skew toward the glass is half empty side of life, but if I were to give in and settle down permanently in the house of indignation, I know I would never leave!
Instead, as we get ready for our trip back to the States (less than one week today!), let me tell you a few (minor) things I won't be missing but that have been making me shake my head and laugh lately.
You know it's hot here, right? How hot is it? So hot that when you raise the lid of the toilet, steam rises from the naturally hot water. Cold, cool, even tepid water temperatures are long gone by now; every bath or shower is a sauna whether you like it our not and even our enormous compound pool that does not have a functioning chiller (yep, that's a thing here) feels like bathwater from top to bottom.
It's so hot that even though the husband put the sunshade in the window before we went into church on Friday, when we got back into the car several hours later, the steering wheel was so hot he couldn't actually hold it to drive. Luckily, we had a solution for that situation:
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| Why did we have holiday hot pads in the car? I don't remember, but look how useful! |
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| J enjoying a virgin mojito on an errand run with Mommy. |
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| I'm pretty convinced the blurriness here comes from the humidity swirling us! |
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