What I miss most right now

Living abroad requires a constant set of negotiations.  One of the balancing acts I'm learning how to manage is finding a way to remember the things we left behind while not dwelling on them so much I start to get dissatisfied with our current lives.  My response to this is to try not to think about what we are missing and focus on what we get to do here that we never would have done in Cleveland or anywhere else for that matter.  I try to keep the kids' spirits up, too, while acknowledging that they miss Shaker Heights and their friends and so many, many other things.  I am the Qatar cheerleader, the desert apologist, the Arabian Gulf cruise's Julie McCoy.  It's very wearing some days.  I see myself become my mother, who used to (and still does) brightly point out all sorts of things along the roads on our long, cross-country trips to keep us interested and entertained.  I used to wonder that she could be so peppy all the time, but now I see how crucial even manufactured pep can be in changing children's moods.  Touché, Sita!

But.

Sometimes there are days when I really miss certain things and will be very happy to see them when we visit the States in the summer.  (See, right there is an example of what I am talking about.  I am very careful not to say "go home" for the summer, even though that is my first instinct, because I want the kids to think of Qatar as home as much as possible and I don't want them to get upset because they still consider Shaker Heights their home and get sad every time they remember they are not there.  My conversations are riddled with these little linguistic tricks I use to--hopefully--help us all adjust and stay adjusted.)

But enough about that!  Today, I am missing retail America.  For all that acquiring things is a national pastime here, retail therapy isn't really done.  People walk into stores, point at what they want, and walk out.  No browsing, no comparison shopping, certainly no impulse control.  Some days I really just want to wander around a TJ Maxx or a Target, you know?  Not even really to buy anything, because I don't need more stuff, as I have said, but it would be nice just to look at things that don't cost twelve quadrillion dollars!  I mean, I appreciate the little touches of some of the malls here, too.  One leaves out baskets of green apples and little water bottles at all the lounge areas throughout the mall.  For free.  Can you imagine such a thing at any mall near you?  But still, these lounges are most often used by women who are exhausted from buying so much, which isn't the same reason I might be using them!

I am also missing simplicity.  Design here is somewhat...overdone for me.  We went to a world trade festival when we first arrived, and I found myself explaining to J that the ornate mirrors and gold treasure chests and intricate glass lamps that make busy Tiffany lamps look positively streamlined were really not my style.  Mommy likes things simple, you see!  But I can't even point to Ikea here as an example because they don't carry quite the same stuff as Ikea USA.  I miss clean lines, for crying out loud!

I also really miss ham!  And boxed stuffing.  And sour jelly beans.  And black beans.  And onion soup mix.  I know, can I be any more prosaic??  I guess it's a good thing that I don't miss anything more profound, right?  Right!  Go Qatar!

That being said, I am very much looking forward to our visit to Germany largely because it gives us all ample opportunity to eat pork.  Bring on the bratwurst and bacon!  Maybe even a spanferkel while we're at it!  Anything with schwein!!

Kicking it

This post is not at all about the Middle East--well, just peripherally it is, just a little bit.  But really, this post is about Veronica Mars!  You see, as some of you know, I was a backer of the Kickstarter campaign to crowdsource the funding for a Veronica Mars movie years after the television show ended abruptly.  For the uninitiated (or for those who couldn't care less about this sort of thing) being a backer meant I made a pledge as part of the campaign that ultimately raised over 5 million dollars.  Mine was a modest pledge, enough to feel like I had contributed and earn myself a t-shirt, a PDF copy of the shooting script, and a digital copy of the movie when it came out.  There were others who pledged much, much more and earned themselves everything from a trip to the premiere(s) to being an extra on the set to an actual speaking role.  I neither had that much money nor was I going to give it to a movie, but I did my small part for the cause.

In truth, when I was re-watching the three seasons on Veronica Mars in preparation for the movie, I realized that somewhere in the middle of the third season I had quit watching, so the end of the show was a revelation for me and had I realized just how much the end left the viewer hanging, I probably would have been even more insistent that I be part of the campaign to tie up loose ends in a movie!

In between the Kickstarter campaign's beginnings and the eventual release of the movie on March 14th, a lot happened for me.  Most importantly, I moved out of the country and far out of the realm of the Kickstarter campaign, though there were people who pledged who lived in Europe and Austrailia and the like, but I was pretty much on the edges of where I assumed the movie would reach when it premiered.  And I was right.  There were premieres in Canada and in various European countries, but I think the closest to me was somewhere in Germany.  And I was not about to fly over there just to see the movie on the big screen!

But not to worry, right?  I got a digital copy of the movie that was sent out to me on the same day as the theatrical premiere so I would be able to watch the movie in the comfort of my own home here in the desert.  Only...there was a problem.  I got my digital download code fine...but it didn't work.  I needed to download a new app and then load the movie onto a new video library in the cloud which the app recognized, but the app wouldn't recognize me or my code nor could I get the cloud library to work properly or at all, really.  I was pretty sick during the week of the premiere, so I calmly emailed customer service and went back to bed, sure I could either work it out when I felt better or when customer service got back to me, whichever came first.  The next day, and the next, I tried again, emailing customer service all along with my progress, or lack thereof.  I finally realized that part of the problem was my computer telling the app I wasn't in North America, the UK, or Europe, so I remedied that problem with my handy dandy VPN service (LOVE this, by the way!) and then tried a few different ways of backing myself into these services to see if I could find a way of leapfrogging the problem areas and then, all at once, I was in!  Success!  So I downloaded the movie as quickly as I could to my iPad and started watching it right then on the desktop, just in case the download failed.  The download functioned perfectly, and I was finally able to watch the movie in its entirety, just a few days after the rest of the world.

Apparently, I was one of the lucky ones.  A significant percentage of backers had problems with the digital downloading and some were even given refunds when they ended up having to purchase the movie in order to watch it at all.  I never did hear from customer service, probably because they were inundated with complaints from these angry backers.  The problem with rabid fans is they are always rabid, particularly when things go wrong!  But I was happy to see the movie at all, especially given my geographical issues.

As for the movie itself (SPOILER ALERT!)...

Sicky

Being sick is the pits.

I haven't been really sick since we came here, thankfully, except for the usual stomach stuff (blah, blah, belch).  Then last week and this one I got hit with a doozy.  E was flirting with croup, as he always does, every 2 months or so, in between his incessant sinus infections, and I got something similar, but apparently worse, since he was only affected at night and I was out for most of last week and still am not quite back.  Sore throat, barking cough, nausea, dizziness, sleeplessness, disorientation, body aches, check, check, triple check.  It's been awful.

And, of course, in the midst of all this we finally had E's birthday party (happy belated 4th birthday!  Your parents are super timely!) and there was school, as usual, and thank goodness the husband was home last weekend and this one or it would have been a catastrophe.  As it was, I basically called in the towel on the kids' party games in favor of them playing in the boys' room and spent a good portion of the party otherwise engaged being sick, but the food was good and the kids were young and had a good time and there were treat bags, so everyone went home happy and I went to bed for the rest of the day.  The next day, I drove the kids to school and came right home and slept for four hours until I had to go pick one of them up, then managed to get to the store for some laundry detergent and take him to the playground until it was time to get the other one and then came home and slowly spiraled downward until the husband got home from work and ordered pizza for dinner and I went to bed again. Rinse, repeat.  I even missed church this weekend, something I so rarely do I can't remember the last time it happened.

Luckily, I feel better now, more or less, though my voice is gone and I still feel dizzy often and I have the sniffles.  But at least I can stay upright, a major improvement.  I even got a load or two of laundry done...or maybe it was two!  Woot!

The underlying problem here is that we don't have a primary care doc or a pediatrician yet.  I keep asking for recommendations and getting very mixed reviews, and I really don't want to wade into the abyss of healthcare in Qatar until I absolutely have to, although by then, of course, it will be too late.  I need to get a pediatrician at the very least since we are on borrowed time with E's cyclical sicknesses and will certainly need an antibiotic before too long AND I really, really need to see a pulmonologist to get some scans taken before I go back to the States in case I need to follow up there.    So those are my goals for the next few months.   E will also need a round of vaccinations soon, if he doesn't need them already, and I think we all need some additional vaccines to keep us a bit more protected here in our second world home.  I think I can wait and have E's done in the US, but the others will undoubtedly be cheaper here or even in Germany when we visit, so I need to get on those as soon as possible.  Wish me luck; I am more certainly going to need it!

This girl's night out!

A few nights ago I went out with some women from church to celebrate a birthday.  I didn't have to leave until the kids were almost ready for bed, so I thought it would be an easy escape.

I was wrong.

The boys screamed and ranted and cried like I was leaving for good.  As the husband pointed out (he was there, by the way.  I wasn't even leaving them with a sitter for crying out loud!), I haven't left to go anywhere by myself at night except for one time since we moved here.  The husband is gone fairly regularly for business dinners or even business trips, but I have stayed at home or taken the boys with me everywhere, every day.  But still, they caterwauled like I was killing them and kept it up until long after I left.

It was heartbreaking to hear, of course, but also completely overblown, so I was only upset for a little while.  And I did have fun, getting to try a Japanese-ish place (I had gyoza, a muddled berries and ginger beer drink, and chili chocolate cake--actually, my meal wasn't Japanese at all, was it?  There was also teriyaki and some noodle dishes, so I guess they can still say they're Japanese, even though I would argue the connection is pretty tenuous!) and getting to chat with some new women.  I am a little starved for adult conversation some times over here right now!

On the way back, I chatted with the husband about how the boys made out.  He was understandably upset about their theatrics and declared that I had just won the family lottery and now got to go out by myself at least once per week so they could get used to it.  I'm pretty excited about the chance to go do something...though I'm going to have to scare up some friends to do it with!  (I don't want my nights out to be pathetic, ya'll!)  So now I'm going to make a list of all the new restaurants I want to try and all the new people I want to get to know better and have some fun! I may even...wait for it...go see a movie IN A THEATER!!  I know, I can't believe it either.  I think the last time I did that was a year ago to see Iron Man number whatever it was with the husband for his birthday and before that...the previous Iron Man movie.  At the very least I need to see something besides Iron Man on the big screen, right? (No disrespect to Robert Downey, Jr., whom I enjoy as much as the next girl!)

Let's get ready to party!!

Going to meet the Queen

Today the boys had a fun experience.  They got to head to the convention center and have their picture taken with Her Highness Sheikha Moza, the mother of the current Emir and the head of the Qatar Foundation.  The Qatar Foundation owns the husband's hospital and the children attend one of several primary and secondary schools also owned by QF.  Today, all 6000 students in these schools are heading to the newly built convention center to have their picture taken with Her Highness.

The boys have had funny reactions to this news.  J has been convinced she is going to ask him about his hair (everyone does!) and has been bursting with excitement since he found out they were going to see "the queen."  This morning he came running down the stairs yelling "Today we get to see the queen! Today we get to see the queen!" I'm a little concerned he will be too excited to listen to his teachers and very disappointed when it turns out he can hardly see Sheikha Moza through the throngs of students (all of whom will be wearing the same uniforms, by the way).  E, on the other hand, has been approaching the whole day with a very vocal sense of dread.  I think he is worried about going on the big buses they will take to get there, nervous about the mammoth convention center that we have seen only from the outside, and maybe even concerned about meeting a real live queen!

I can't wait to hear how it all goes.  I spoke to the boys' teachers, and they were equal parts nervous and resigned.  E's teacher said last year she was told to sit her three and four year old students on a line and then walk away.  She was incredulous and worried she would have some runners but thankfully they did stay seated.  I'm worried E will be the problem child who actually does run away this time, but his favorite friend is in class today, so that will help if they can just keep those two together.

UPDATE: They boys performed well but were disappointed not to see the Queen.  As I said, with 6000 students, the chances of being even near her were slim, but apparently the highlights of getting to ride in a bus "that looked just like an airplane inside!" and really great packed lunches (J even got two, one later for "tea" his teacher said) outweighed not getting to see her!

But look at what they missed!

these and even more images available at http://sheikhamozahfashion.tumblr.com

(I think they are all splendid, really, though my favorites are the purple and the black and white ombre gown.)

A sense of direction

One of the ways I most quickly acclimatize to a new place is getting familiar with the roads.  Until I can get from one important place to another confidently, I feel adrift, images in my head whirling around as I try (and fail) to get my bearings while someone else is driving.  It doesn't help that I have a very poor understanding North, South, East, and West.  Coming of age in Hawaii where the major directions are "toward the ocean" and "toward the mountains" has always hurt me when it comes to orienting myself on a compass.  Fortunately, I have a fabulous ability to orient myself to landmarks.  If I drive to a place once, I can get back there again, following landmarks.

But Qatar is challenging my skillz, yo!  The constant construction here means that routes change without notice.  The lawless driving means that new "roads" appear daily as some lemming-like urge suddenly causes people to drive across empty lots and fields and create their own paths, which may or may not conflict with already established traffic patterns.  Even electronic maps can't keep up with the  new developments in official roads, let alone account for construction blockages and sheer driver bullheadedness.   Plus, road names here are virtually meaningless anyway.  You would think the fact that everyone gives directions via landmarks would work for me, but here it just results in people never bothering to find out the names of major roads so you find yourself saying things like I did the other day when I was trying to give directions to someone who was coming to pick up some empty boxes we had: "You know the flyover on X road after the expressway?  So you go through the roundabout under the flyover, then straight through the next roundabout, then you pass Y compound on your right, then at the next roundabout with the two petrol stations you flip a U turn and then take your second right and look for the mosque on your left and then you will see our compound where the road dead-ends."  Unfortunately, this is as good as it gets, since only one of these roundabouts even has an unofficial name, the road you turn on to get to my place isn't named at all, and our compound doesn't show up on any maps yet.  Sheesh!

So I am persevering, and I am winning the battle, slowly, with the help of GPS and my landmarks.  Sometimes, ever more frequently, without the help of GPS, which brings me inordinate satisfaction.  The other day, we were trying to get to the wholesale vegetable market from a new direction.  The lovely voice of Google Maps told me to get on the expressway to shorten our trip, but when I took the suggested route, I discovered that the expressway entrance recommended had been closed without any indication signs or suggested detours.  I knew more or less where we were and how to get back to another major road so I started making my way back there.  Meanwhile, the voice kept trying to route me back to the expressway, again and again telling me to turn the way I didn't want to go, but I didn't have time to turn it off, so I ignored it.

All the sudden, J asked "Has that lady ever BEEN to the vegetable market?? Cause she really doesn't know where she is going, does she?"  After laughing for quite a while, we had a fun discussion about maps and electronic information and computer algorithms and artificial intelligence as I tried to explain that the voice didn't really belong to a person but to a computer (because that's the kind of thing we always discuss in the car, no joke!) as we made our way back to a route that Google Maps recognized and the voice started to be helpful again.  At the end of our chat and our journey, J said indignantly "I think we need to help them correct their maps so that she doesn't tell people the wrong way to go!"  Ever since that day, whenever we use Google Maps, which is thankfully less and less each week, he is quick to ask if she is sending us the right way or not.  Usually, I now know enough to be able to scan ahead and make sure we aren't about to go on a wild goose chase through areas I know are full of construction, but I know J still believes she can't be trusted!

Easy listening

There are only three English language radio stations here.  One is the Qatar Foundation station, which has strange programming, beginning with a meditation hour which is followed by an English morning show (your typical two DJs and their cast of characters, with sports, interviews, and music thrown in. And by music, I mean Jefferson Airplane and Elton John, etc.).  Want to feel completely out of your depth? Listen to a British sports announcer discuss what happened in cricket and soccer over the weekend.  I have NO IDEA what anyone is saying ever!  After the morning show, classical music and instrumental oldies are interspersed randomly interspersed with recorded interviews with members of the Qatar Foundation describing their work and bizarre information pieces on topics like the origins of ice cream or comets.  I like the morning show, but it doesn't start until after I drop the kids off at school, and the later programming is sometimes frustrating because you never know when there is going to be music, muzak, or talk.

The second station, Qatar Radio, plays international music sung in English, which mainly consists of wacky songs from all sorts of genres (mostly pop songs by Filipino artists) mixed in with a few top 40 UK or American artists (I just switched to that station and they were playing Royals by Lorde followed by Want Dem All by Seal Paul...?  Never heard of it?  Me either.  Apparently he's Jamaican?)  Most of the pop is really frenetic, and I find it difficult to listen to that music while dealing with the crazy traffic so I mostly skip this station.

The third station is the audio feed from the English language station of Al Jazeera television.  You knew Al Jazeera was based in Qatar, right?  It's one of the country's greatest claims to fame--or infamy, depending on your perspective--and certainly the country's biggest contribution to the international scene.  And as much as I love listening to the news, I can only take so much of it.  The world is far to depressing for a steady diet of news.

So what to listen to when trapped for long periods of the day in the car?  Ladies and gentlemen, I have become the queen of the podcasts!

You see, it occurred to me shortly after I arrived here and was pushed into got an iPhone that surely there was something within all those available apps that could help me.  And what was this new kind of broadcasting all the kids were talking about...five to ten years ago?  (I live in the vanguard of technology, I know!)  After a little searching, I found the podcast app, and I have never looked back.  I'm hooked!